Christmas is coming, and all too fast. Retailers, battered by cautious consumers who have already adjusted their spending habits to recessionary times, started advertising their Christmas sales even before Hallowe’en was out of the way. I even saw one report of a January Sale.

Still, if you spot the perfect gift, it’s never too easy to buy it. And for at least one person I know, the perfect gift is the toy that does less.

Mobile phones are ubiquitous in Ireland. According to more than one survey, there are more phones than people in this country.

But what if you have no desire for a phone that comes with a camera? What if you can’t tell and MP3 player from a blackberry.

What if you really don’t care if there’s a radio on your phone or not. And as for bluetooth, isn’t that an infection cause by a lack of Vitamin A?

Well, if all you need from your phone is a phone, I’ve got just the thing for you. It’s reassuringly dull and predictable, and comes with actual finger sized, just on case if you know someone who grumbles about fiddling with those tiny keys.

Order while stocks last.

By Gerard Cunningham

Gerard Cunningham occupies his time working as a journalist, writer, sub-editor, blogger and podcaster, yet still finds himself underemployed.