JANUARY: Following Murdoch takeover, Storyful announce new unit dedicated to verifying iPhone papshots of C-list celebrities.
FEBRUARY: MicroSoft finally figures out how to make money out of Nokia, announce relaunch of 6310i.
MARCH: Edward Snowden reveals NSA secretly unfollows your friends on twitter, sends ‘likes’ of John Waters to Facebook on your behalf.
APRIL: All national print and broadcast media put days of effort into April Fools’ hoaxes. Nobody laughs.
MAY: Fianna Fáil makes gains in Local elections. Micheál Martin insufferable all summer.
JUNE: Brown Thomas Grafton Street store launches its Christmas theme window
JULY: Horrific casualties in Silly Season summer school riots as MacGill launches sneak attack on Merriman.
AUGUST: Mass panic as country goes three days without rain.
SEPTEMBER: Stephen Donnelly and Lucinda Creighton announce new party. Peter Mathews walks out in disagreement over who has the best hair.
OCTOBER: TV3 executives apologise after Vincent Browne axe attack incident.
NOVEMBER: Flegs dispute settled after Obama threatens to make all parties listen to the poetry of Michael D Higgins.
DECEMBER: Marian Finucance praised for groundbreaking radio show in which she broadcasts two hours consisting entirely of coughing up phlegm.